you still there? me too.
I gave a toast a week and a couple of days ago
to two of my best friends.
they happen to be my brother & his bride.
It was about marriage. Which some folks might think is pretty rich, seeing as how I’ve failed miserably.
Sometimes friends – or anyone left reading-
You have to fail.
The secret of marriage is that we all fail miserably. And the crappiest part is that we don’t honestly share that with every one sauntering into the great union. We should. We should treat marriage more like we treat parenting. Knowing that some days – you are going to fail & yell, and be the biggest ass. But that’s ok, it’s even expected, -because we’re human. And we get to try to do better tomorrow. Sometimes tomorrow doesn’t happen for 3 years.
I gave my brother & my Marpants my best advise, which was given to me by a lady who’d been married quite a while and still liked her man:
“Don’t hurt their core.”
That’s how you get home. That’s how you keep on. That’s how you stay true. It’s easier to take out our pain, our shortcomings, and insecurities on the one who’s there. Try like hell not to. Try like hell to realize that the greatest of these things we’ve got going is love.
Not the easy love. The long one. The one at the end of one of your lost and winding road that says:
I’m so glad you came home. I forgive you. I love you. I believe in you. And I see you for who you are and hold you to be your best.
because sometimes we fail exactly how we need to. exactly how we’re supposed to – to come home better & to come home wiser -to come home right.
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